So today/yesterday (as it is now 12.21am and I am confused as to what day I should call it) was deadline/hand-in day for all of the work which I have completed for the first year of my degree. It is SO bloody scary to think that I have made it through my first year and that in September I will be a second year degree student! I don’t wanna be an adult yet! Please life, slow down!
I cannot believe how unbelievably quickly the first year of my degree has flown by, I honestly feel like someone just pressed fast-forward on my life in September and we ended up here in May, at the end of my first year!
It doesn’t seem like 2-minutes ago that I was sitting on my boyfriends bed the evening before my first day, trying to get into my head that from the day after I was going to be a university student, and that I was going to have a degree. And quite honestly I still don’t think that I quite believe it now, I don’t feel old enough, Im sure that I am still 15 in my head, studying for my GCSE’s and loving life! ahah!
Quite a few times along the way I have had wobbles, meltdowns, panic attacks and wanted to give it all up and start again. But seeing all of the hard work and hours that I have put in over the past few months come together into my final piece makes it worth it. It makes me realise that not everything is going to be easy but I should never give up, because it will be worth it in the end.
I still don’t know what I want to be ‘when I grow up’ but instead of me searching for my dream job, I am going to just do what doing what I am enjoying doing at the time, and learn lots of new skills and hope that my dream job finds me! Although I have probably said multiple times throughout the year that ‘I hate it’ and ‘I don’t want to be a Graphic Designer anymore’, I have realised that it doesn’t really matter whether I end up being a Graphic Designer or not, because it is what I have learned along the way that counts, and that will take me to where I truly want to be (in theory anyway). I am so glad that I stuck it out, because I have learned so many new skills already!
Even-though it has been tough, not only for me, but also for my family – who I am eternally grateful to for supporting me no-matter what and for putting up with all of my stresses and meltdowns – I can honestly say now that I have really enjoyed my first year at university, and I am so glad that I did it!
Just got to wait and see what results I get now! Eek!
Love Leanne xx